Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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