I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Apparently you make a good broom.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
