But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
