we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
