Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
