the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
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