I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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