Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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