'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Randomize
