YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
