Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
