That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
