I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
