Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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