I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
