His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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