he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
