but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
