This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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