Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
