I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Randomize
