What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
pray to the hookup gods
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
