I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
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