I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Randomize
