it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
