I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Randomize
