Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
you traded sex for a burrito?
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
