k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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