so that wasnt chicken after all
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
