Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
