This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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