It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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