Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
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