but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Randomize
