how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize