why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
