Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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