she looked like the bat from fern gully.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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