People with herpes should wear stickers.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
