ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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