ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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