Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
