the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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