If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
wow bdsm is so cute
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