it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
