You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Randomize
