Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Randomize
