Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I accidentally burped into my bong.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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