Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
