HIV tests are more positive than that guy
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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